• basiclemmon98@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 days ago

    Yes, it would apply equally, but I guess that I should rephrase: It is not that they find it hot that is the creepy part, it’s the fact that it is inherently fetishization of a sexuality that is not meant to involve them. Essentially, it feels kind of disrespectful and creepy for a guy to get off thinking about women who have decided to have sex with other women (I don’t mean decided to be lesbian, bc obvs that isn’t a choice), because he was never even in the demographic they wanted to have sex with, and by getting off to that, you are (at least a little) probobly imagining yourself having sex with them, and they would not even want that with you (at least in this instance). This same principle does apply to women getting off to gay men, it is just as disrespectful and fetishizing. Now, whether you agree with the thought process or not is completely up to you, but I personally find men fetishizing my sex that intentionally does not include them to be unwelcomed and creepy.

    • Novaling@lemmy.zip
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      1 day ago

      I think the thing to focus on is bothering real people. If a guy jacks it to Yuri, who gives a shit, they’re pictures. Same thing for girls and yaoi. Although I dislike it a bit, guys jacking to irl lesbians (like porn) doesn’t hurt anybody either, and vice versa. It’s when we get into that “harassment of real people” territory where you should be shamed. If you’re a guy being creepy to lesbians/queer people online/irl, you are a disgusting human being who is making others uncomfortable. Same for women who do the same to gay/queer people.

      Basically, ethically gooning and having “toxic fetishes” is possible. As long as a foot fetishist doesn’t get hot and bothered around people at a waterpark, nor begs for feet pics from randos in their DMs, who the fuck am I to judge? It’s once you can’t control your fetish around unwilling participants that you get the horny bonk.

    • undefinedValue@programming.dev
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      2 days ago

      It’s certainly not “disrespectful” to have sexual fantasies, stop gatekeeping desire you weirdo. It’s not even a fetishization, I find that to be an over complication of what’s really going on when straight men consider lesbian sex to be hot.

      The formula is quite simple (from the perspective of a man):

      1. The least sexy thing about sex is my participation in it as the man
      2. The most sexy thing about sex is the woman, regardless of what she’s doing

      Therefore when we crunch the numbers and Cary the zero, it becomes clear that there is no upper bound to the amount of women participants in sex but male participants should be capped.

      TLDR we like women

      • Ŝan@piefed.zip
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        2 days ago

        The least sexy thing about sex is my participation in it as the man

        🤣

        I love þe implication þat þere exists sexiness equations; your’s and mine seem to be simply sexiness = #women / #men

      • basiclemmon98@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        2 days ago

        I was asked for an explanation, and I gave one. Again, agreeing or disagreeing is up to you, but our feelings about it are not. Have a nice day!