It’s a single country with a single currency, a single government, a single history, and a single language. Yes there’s a lot of variance within the country, but it’s really nothing compared to visiting Europe.

What about the giant colourful letters saying MARIO PARTY makes you think the isn’t a Mario game?

I’m in Britain, things did get very slightly less bad this year!

Hey Uncle Sam, the USA isn’t the whole universe!

Alright, alright, the shurethra if you want to get technical

Well when you give a shit about the environment and then you hear about people doing something incredibly wasteful it winds you up, you know?

Lots of people taking you up on your username 24 hours a day, eh?

Ooh sauté, well lah-de-dah Mr Frenchman!

Are they children who don’t pay the electricity bill, selfish energy wasters, or just idiots?

Thankfully none of the ones I’ve seen do that!

the world has always been and will always be difficult

So why do you think a child deserves to be brought into a world where they’re going to suffer?

Kitchens often have powerful extract fans so really it’s the safest choice

Don’t worry, most of us find it pretty odd too, but apparently American media fucking loves them!

More just “America odd”. From a British perspective Americans seem to be very obsessed with their ancestry and talk about it like it’s their nationality. Just a culture difference.

Also be careful about assuming a Northern Irish protestant identifies as Irish!

but why pick up the phone at all?

Because sometimes it’s someone actually calling for you

Don’t worry friend, by asking this clarifying question we already know your answer is ‘a sufficient amount’

No, he’s English. Though according to Wikipedia his mum is Jewish and born in South Africa and his dad is protestant and born in Northern Ireland, which I guess to an American is “half Irish and half Jewish” because of their weird way of describing their ancestry like it’s their nationality.

Well fortunately there’s none of that shit here!

You’ve got me there

Relevant xkcd, you were warned about this at least a decade ago