The inaccurate ones are the scariest. That crab isn’t remotely natural, it must be the work of a truly gifted and insane necromancer.

My shop makes big ones and little ones, but the big ones are always sold out by the time I drag my ass over there

I can walk into any donut shop and I already know what I want. If you can’t do that I suspect you’re some kind of foreign agent who isn’t familiar with what you might find in a donut shop.

BTW, it’s apple fritters, and I’ll have three, thanks.

JD: I saw some dudes on TikTok that were showing off amazing advances in toupee technology

Barber: I got you fam

Absolutely, some of them are the staunchest Zionists

They wouldn’t want to make more money because that would mean they’d have to pay a higher tax rate. Don’t try to explain how tax brackets actually work because you’ll just make them angry for highlighting their ignorance.

I’d like to see a cookie notice that just says “it’s your browser, figure out how to get it to handle cookies however you want. If you accept cookies we’re gonna use them and you can safely assume we’ll use them for anything and everything they might be useful for. European regulators can eat a bag of dicks.”

Of course he does. How do you think he gets those dreamy eyes?

Two punches for calling it Aluminium

I’m not going to win a cup stacking competition anytime soon either, but that doesn’t mean I have to take it seriously as a sport and respect the competitors.

Yeah, absolutely. They’re the world’s best Candy Land players while we’re playing Catan or some shit over here.

What do you mean?

Olympic shooting is so specialized and restricted that you can no longer claim its champions are the best in the world at the general sport of shooting.

Why is more power in the equipment being used automatically better?

Because more power is required to reach the distances where everything matters more.

Shooting is a test of accuracy.

Uh-huh. Do I really need to explain how one degree of error is a bigger issue at 1000 meters vs 50?

there’s no need to disparage the sport and disrespect the athletes

When OP is implying my tribe can’t shoot I take it as disrespect and I’m compelled to belittle the competition itself in response.

I didn’t watch it, but I did run across some bullshit on the Internet implying that the Chinese dominating ping pong somehow means the US can’t compete at Tennis.

It’s like if they wanted to have motorsports in the Olympics but they only did go-karts and 49cc motorcycles. The people who show up to compete will be talented, but they aren’t driving F1 or MotoGP.

The world’s best target shooters under a very specific and particular set of circumstances, usually indoors. It’s like you’re trying to insult me for not being impressed at the driving skills of the world’s best indoor go-kart racers.

I’m just not impressed with any marksmanship that maxes out at 50 meters. Regardless of how powerful a gun is it’s not impressive to be accurate at such a short range. I don’t care about how powerful the gun is, I just want to see it fling something far enough to be interesting.

For children to use.

They do in California too. It’s the whole country.

Shotguns. No, and no.

It’d be nice if they had a long range category with real rifles. Most countries are already uncomfortable letting their people have access to Olympic pea shooters, so I don’t think we’ll ever see 1000 meter shooting as an event.

At this point we’ve only had finals for the events that use children’s guns. I’m not really surprised that China would beat us at shooting children’s guns. They’d probably win a tricycle race too.