Ladies, if your boyfriend…

Run for your lives!

Awesome, now I can stop messing around with Optiscaler

That’s alright, I want it that way

It’s basically just, he mispronounces “me” as “may” at the end of the chorus, so the meme is “It’s Gonna Be May”

This guy gets it

Who is she?

Tbf, I don’t think there’s any record of even historical Jesus to have shat himself, so that is an “opposite,” in a way.

Yeah, surprisingly enough, rubbing alcohol makes a great degreaser, it’s also good for like, when you take a sticker or a label off of something, and it leaves a residue behind? That stuff, rubbing alcohol takes it right off.

Personal anecdote, one of my buddies in college had the misfortune of “being the first guy to fall asleep at the party” so of course we drew a bunch of dicks and stuff on his face. The only thing we could find to clean it off the next day was a bottle of 90% isopropyl, and a little bit got into his eye, he got so mad that he punched a hole in his bathroom wall.

“Nice drugs nerd, did your mom get them for you?”

A - “A move”

I figured you’d want some fabric in those sensitive areas

This is the most relatable one yet

They’re great for tearing the shingles off of a roof!

It’s grey, she just likes the color

Well, maybe once my dreams come true, I can report back to you

Like a mouthful of worn pantyhose that has done an office shift and then inhale through the nose

How’d you find my diary?

It’s a sauce used for thickening, but that’s not important right now

Fantastic! I’d been resorting to bloodletting with mine, a pill that reduces the reaction I get from just looking at my Aliexpress LLF™ would be a lifesaver, and reduce the scarring!

I knew I shouldn’t have taken that pill from the sketchy dude with cool glasses!