I pick up the newspaper and everyday there’s a new horrible story about him that’s somehow become trite since all this oaf does is disparage other, loaf about, and take what he can from others to engorge himself. He’s ruining this country in every way, shape, and form but somehow he has millions of cult followers. He’s above any punishment yet forces us to suffer his existence like some sort of sick, kafkaesque joke. This absolute piece of shit has no redeeming qualities and yet we let him keep breathing air. It’s impossible to scroll online without seeing his gross orange face pop up on screen. I swear if I hear him say “I hate Mondays” or “I love lasagna” one more time I am going to lose it. Save us from this Garfieldian agony.
I was told there’s an English lord who was so reviled that when he died they rolled a massive rock onto his grave lest he ever rise again (rumors that he dabbled in magic might have informed the decision).
That would be appropriate for Trump. Or similarly, bury him in a deep geologic repository (where we put our vitrified spent fissile fuel beneath signs warning THIS IS NOT A PLACE OF HONOR ) as a reminder of how we never want another person like him to exist.
Nah just throw him in a dumpster and be done with it
That would rob countless generations of the ability to piss on his grave.
Hang Him from something and let that fucker rot.
Fine, I’ll set it on fire with kerosene. Just in case.
Why wait to roll a huge boulder?
That story gives Gruntilda from Banjo-Kazooie vibes