• did_you_find_violets@lemmy.worldOP
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    2 days ago

    the concept of a female perspective meme about libertinage being an incel meme…

    the only angle i see in which it could be seen that way is if you think all women are puritanical prudes, which is misogynistic. ironic.

    • ☭SaltyIcetea☭@lemmy.ml
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      2 days ago

      nah they got a point, thats the typa post id expect to see on 4chan right before they invent a new slur that no one will ever use

      • did_you_find_violets@lemmy.worldOP
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        2 days ago

        nah, relegating a woman’s expression of libertinage, vanity, or playful detachment to the realm of “inceldom” is deeply puritanical. it suggests that women aren’t allowed to be chaotic, selfish, or purely driven by the ego-boost of the chase. it assumes women must only want wholesome, committed love & be passive, relationship-seeking partners

    • DeLancre@piefed.social
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      2 days ago

      I will be honest, I’m somewhat proud of my proficiency level in English, especially considering I learned russian and German in school.

      But your comment confuses me, cause I don’t understand half of it.

      • ☭SaltyIcetea☭@lemmy.ml
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        21 hours ago

        same here, had to read 3 times and rely on context. it does seem like they are using complex language just for the sake of using complex language

      • tourist@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Don’t worry about it. Your English is probably fine.

        I’m high and also kinda struggled to understand it

        I think this is the first time I’ve seen the word “libertinage”

    • usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca
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      2 days ago

      Change your perspective and imagine the meme was made by a (male) incel and you’ll get what they were getting at.

      • did_you_find_violets@lemmy.worldOP
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        2 days ago

        i’m imagining it. the content doesn’t change, so the meaning of the meme doesn’t change (fun without commitment). the only thing that could cause someone to label it as “incel” is, ironically, the reader’s own biases about women.

        my points still stand.

        • nyctre@piefed.social
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          2 days ago

          Guy that’s mad because he’s been flirting with a woman and wants to get with her but she explains to him that she doesn’t wanna be with him but just wants him to want her.

          It’s not how I read it initially, but hear me out…

          Wants to get in a relationship but can’t? Check. Blames the woman for it? Check

          Incel’s perspective checks out, imo.

          • did_you_find_violets@lemmy.worldOP
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            2 days ago

            again, this “interpretation” only works if the reader already has certain biases about women - specifically that women owe men a monogamous, serious, long term relationship, and wanting something casual, fun, noncommittal makes them “bad” somehow. which is the real misogynistic perspective.

            and the meme doesn’t blame the woman in any way at all. the woman just doesn’t want a relationship & wants some fun without commitment. that’s it. anything else is just the reader projecting their own biases.

            • nyctre@piefed.social
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              1 day ago

              I agree, mostly, as that’s how I read it as well. But I also think that it’s easier to misunderstand that you’re making it out to be. Because there’s context from your previous posts which isn’t explained in this meme. There’s just the mention of fling in the title but the actual meme only says “I wanna be single but I want you to be obsessed with me”. And a person in a non monogamous relationship wouldn’t refer to themselves as “single”, for example, which leads to more confusion, I think