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Dutch porn be like: Oh no stepbro, Im stukkie wukkie!
Dutch is not a language. The people who “speak” it are Germans who suffered severe head injuries. The place we call “the Netherlands” is a German hospital colony where those unfortunate people can live while they recover. That’s why it’s flat and everyone walks or rides bicycles; their head injuries make them unfit to drive cars or to manage difficult terrain.
/s, please don’t send the actual Dutch after me.
I am Belgian and live close to the border, I know plenty of them.
Whatever they are they are not german.
They have a soul, sometimes smile and have humor.
And definite proof is that when one comes into the same room as you the temperature doesn’t drop significantly, also there is no detectable smell of sulfer.
Definitely not german.Toffe gebruikersnaam hebt ge daar menne man
Niet lang over nagedacht, toch blij mee
Het is te laat, je hebt de Nederlanders opgeroepen, makker. Bereid je voor op k o l o n i s a t i e.
spoiler
It is too late, you summoned the Dutch, mate. Prepare to be c o l o n i s e d.
Do you implement your healthcare system in your colonies? Also how likely are the colonizers to marry the locals and produce tall offspring?
Asking for a friend.
First question: no, best we can do is force you to build dykes.
Second question: we wouldn’t actually visit you, we would hire your neighbors to subdue you.
Bummer! Although an update to our water management infrastructure would be welcome.
First question: no, best we can do is force you to build dykes.
*dikes
Then again, this being Lemmy maybe you meant it as written!
Both spellings can mean wall for holding back water, and things spelled with a “y” are 20% cooler.
Dutch one is still semi private
How does “opgeroepen” translate to “summoned”??? It’s clearly “aufgerufen” - i.e. “invoked”. Smh my head.
As in all such matters, it is the German version which is wrong
I just read it as “called up”, though granted Dutch ain’t my first language (or even second),
The Dutch are simply swamp Germans, best left to their own ways. Much like the mountain Germans you find between Bavaria and Italy.
Time to find out if I can ban fellow admins.
Trump v Musk reenactment!
This makes an incredible amount of sense so I can’t imagine the Dutch understanding what you’ve written.
New theory: the reason the Hogeweyk concept was effectively implemented in The Netherlands is because the entire country is that concept.
Binty Blease, y u ride babby traen?
“We apologize again for the dutch in the sign. Those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked have been sacked.”
A mööse once bit my sister.
But the moose got better?
To shreds, you say?
Dutch language could be what English went thru to become what it is today. Maybe in a thousand years it would converge
Is this a real photo?
ja hoor!
this is obviously a joke but it contains more dutch than people unfamiliar with the language might guess.
here is google’s translation of a verbatim transcription of the image:
oopsie woopsie! the train is a piece of shit!
we are working really hard to make this maybe you can fwietsen better owo
Here are a few other variations with even better translations
- Oepsie! De trein is stukkie wukkie! We sijn heul hard aan t werk om dit te make mss kan je beter. ⇨ Oopsie! The train is a bit wonky! We are working really hard to fix this maybe you can do better.
- Oepsie! De trein is stukkie! We sijn heul hard aan t werk om dit te make mss kan je beter. ⇨ Oops! The train is broken! We are working very hard to fix this maybe you can do better.
- Google suggests changing the former to: Oepsie! De trein is stukkie! We zijn heel hard aan t werk om dit te make mss kan je beter. ⇨ Oops! The train is broken! We are working very hard to fix this maybe you can do better.
- which translates in the other direction from Oops! The train is broken! We are working very hard to fix this maybe you can do better. to Oeps! De trein is kapot! We werken er hard aan om dit te verhelpen, misschien kun jij het beter doen.
Maybe a Dutch speaker will comment here and tell us how many of the words in the image are actual Dutch words? I suspect google is probably providing plausible translations for some that aren’t really.
Flemish person here, lemmy do an attempt to translate preserving the infantile language:
Oopsy woopsy! the train is broky woky! We aww wowking vewwy hawd to fwix it. Mby you should bike instead owo
It’s more like : oopsie woopsie! The train has broken down. We’re trying very hard to fix it. Maybe you’d better take a bike (or “bwike”)
I assume "oopsie woopsie " is not a typical phrase in the Netherlands, and it’s like Ned Flanders from The Simpsons saying “whoospie doodle”?
Haha “flanders”
Yeah it’s like saying “whoopsie daisy”. It’s not super uncommon but usually used as a joke/sarcastically.
Yes, correct.
They are better because googol translate sucks. Stop using that garbage.
It’s not correct Dutch, but the best translation is: whoopsy whoops! The train is broken! We are working very hard to fix this. Maybe you would be better of biking. owo
to add back the owo stuff:
Oopsie whoopsie, the train is brokie wokie! We are working vuhry hard to fix this. Maybe you would be better of bwiking. owo.
This is the best match so far
The English translation of ‘stukkie wukkie’ would surely be the train is ‘stuck’?
I’m not a Dane though so could be wrong.
It relates to stuk, which means broken in this context. It can also mean a piece. You could read it as (broken) into pieces.
The English translation of ‘stukkie wukkie’ would surely be the train is ‘stuck’?
Google translates “stukkie wukkie” as “piece of shit” or “wonky”, depending on other nearby words, and “stukkie” as “broken”. but neither of these words is in a dutch dictionary afaict. And google doesn’t translate anything i tried to those words.
I’m not a Dane though so could be wrong.
Dutch is the language (and demonym) of the Netherlands.
Dane is the demonym for people from Denmark, where they speak the Danish language.
Stop using shitty googol translate, it sucks.
If you’re still interested, ‘Stukkie’ comes from ‘stuk’ which means broken. The -kie that is added is to infantilize the word, usually to refer to a smaller object you’d use -je instead, -kie is more of a dialect which is why you won’t find it in a dictionary. ‘Wukkie’ means as much as the ‘woopsie’ in ‘oopsie woopsie’, to make it sound even more infantile.
So a literal translation would be ‘The train is brokey wokey’
Oops. Replying on mobile is annoying sometimes because you can only see the comment you’re directly replying to, and not the OOP (at least in the app I’m using). So I had to hold ‘Dutch’ in my brain and by the time I’d finished my reply, I’d misremembered Dutch to Danish - hence Dane. Apologies.
UwU
Why can I read this? I dont speak Dutch
Because Dutch is the blackout drunk bastard child of German and English. So knowing either or both of those languages helps a lot.
I actually described how dutch sounded to me to some dutch friends. I said something like, “Dutch sounds like if a German got drunk, tried learning English, and then started choking.”
They told me that wasn’t far off 😂
It’s like the dutch sent someone to England to learn from their literary Shakespearean prowess, but the guy forgot half of what he has learnt on his way back to Holland.
Viktor Zhjarnek
zhj
They’re not Dutch but this sounds suspiciously like a mournful nightwish song the name of which I cannot recall
