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Honestly the idea that parasites all share a single, simple method of reproduction is the silliest thing in this comic. There’s a cordyceps fungus that not only has a stage in an ant, it then swells and reddens the abdomen of the ant, takes over the behavior of the ant and forces it to climb to the top of a stalk of grass, and has it wave in the air until a bird mistakes it for a berry and swoops down and eats it. At this point it has a whole other phase of its life cycle inside the bird until it finally releases its spores in the bird’s droppings.
(I probably have a few of the details here not quite right, as it’s not my field of expertise, but it’s along these lines, including the behavior modification and the two separate host species.)
There are so many kinds of parasites, and they do so many crazy things.
First of all, Papa Smurf didn’t create Smurfette. Gargamel did. She was sent in as Gargamel’s evil spy with the intention of destroying the Smurf village. But the overwhelming goodness of the Smurf way of life transformed her. And as for the whole gang-bang scenario - It just couldn’t happen. Smurfs are asexual. They don’t even have reproductive organs under those little white pants. That’s what’s so illogical, you know, about being a Smurf. What’s the point of living… if you don’t have a dick?
This means that Gargamel was heroically working to contain the infestation and researching a cure.
what happened to the shirt?
This is Sassette erasure and I won’t stand for it! /s
There’s just one little problem…
I do believe she eventually grows to the age of consent, but I could be wrong.
Of course, I was saying “only female” is Sassette erasure. I was not saying “only mating prospect” is Sassette erasure.
I was just remembering her from my childhood. I wasn’t up on my Sassette lore. I found a reference that says she was created the same way Smurfette was, which surprised me.
I looked it up and she was added in 1966 - Smurfette is a boomer. Incidentally I learned that they retconned in female smurfs starting in 2008. Also, here’s my disgustingly necessary condemnation of rule 34.
They do not reproduce (setting aside Smurfette, who is technically a Golem) and they also do not die… they must be DIVINE MANIFESTATIONS.
Prions
Yeah didnt Papa Smurf make Smurfette with magic?
Their enemy made smurfette with magic to seduce them
Yes, Gargamel made her out of blue clay, Papa Smurf did the “beautification”.
Thanks it’s been over 40 years since I could tolerate the Smurfs. I tried watching it once as an adult and it was brutal.
Did you try watching the old cartoons or did you curse yourself with the newer movies?
80s cartoons of my youth
Well…yeah, in the same sense that the bedroom is “where the magic happens.” Did you think they meant literal magic lol? Papa Smurf definitely fucks bro.
They’re U-social parasitoids; one reproducing female, one fertile male, and a large number of sterile male workers. They infest human areas and manipulate them into protecting their nests. Gargamel tried to inhibit their spread by introducing a sterile female to this colony after an unknown event caused their breeding female to disappear. Likely the colony would have raided another colony for its female if they had located one, making Gargamel’s intervention necessary to prevent them looking for a fertile replacement queen.
Fun fact: I sometimes watch the new stuff with my niece and they have many female characters now. The latest season even has a girl village next to the normal one and they regularly interact with each other but there are female only episodes as well. The normal village also has women, I’m not sure about the exact (gender) dynamics at play
So the new version passes the Bechdel test?
Wow! TIL. Also, maybe less surprisingly, I just found that EURIMAGES has it as a criterion, so I guess no public EU money for your movie project if it doesn’t pass the test.
no, but it does pass the Smurfdel Smurf
Yeah but one does have to question if segregation is actually progress
It’s even funny the way the parent comment described it: a girl town right next to the normal town.
- I’m an uncle, not a parent
- I wrote another comment somewhere else: the main village contains women but there is a small group of young girls with a separate village
I think the emphasis was on you calling it the normal town, instead of “boy town”.
Calling it “normal” and other “girl town” means that the “girl town” is abnormal.
Again, it’s not a boy town. One town is mixed – both in age and gender but mainly adults – and one consists of a handful of young girls – which is an abnormal demographic. There is no boy town.
No, the main village contains women but there is a small village with a young girl clique. Gargamel has his niece and nephew for a visit. Might be special for smaller kids. The episodes weren’t that long online (they aren’t anymore but older episodes are)
Depends on the culture.
The Air Nomads were segregated in Avatar, but they were sexually progressive forever, and raised children communally. Stuff like that is fine.
I know nothing of Smurf lore, but they don’t seem like one of those repressive segregated cultures.
Henchman 24: Come on! They have one female servicing a large group of males. That implies a species that lays eggs.
Henchman 21: Oh my God, you’re crazy! They’re so obviously mammals!
Henchman 24: Please! She’d be in estrus 24/7 if she didn’t lay eggs.
Henchman 21: Smurfs don’t lay eggs! I won’t tell you this again! Papa Smurf has a fucking beard! They’re mammals!
Insects have hair that serves several purposes, and birds can have feathers that resemble hair. Also there are mammals that lay eggs so there’s that too.
Did Henchman 21 ever hear of the Bearded Dragon?
Goats have beards and they lay eggs
Monotremes
HENCH 4 LIFE
This was covered back in '93 on usenet. Behold: Smuckfest!
What most people don’t know is why Smurfs are blue. Well, the reason is because Smurfs only have sex once a year.
Face it: if you had sex only once a year, you’d be blue, too.
Everyone I argue online with is a Smurf?
Once they all get off, they just look like normal little wrinkly ballsacks for awhile.
This is ancient furry porn, isn’t it?
Huh. I’m not sure how far back furries go.
If not, it’s certainly proto furry porn. Pretty sure it predates the formulation of Rule 34.
Years ago I found a page that reasoned that the whole thing is a communist propaganda (they have no money, share food etc), then SWITCH and they went on how the whole thing is a Nazi propaganda (the bad guy looks like an archetypical jew who wants to make gold of them, etc).
I can’t find the original, but there’s a lot of sites that claim one or the other
archetypical jew who wants to make gold of them
He also makes a golem from clay (smurfette)
New elmo tweet incomming, people
And the smurfs wear white hoods. Except the leader who wears red (like the klan)
He has wanted them fir different purposes at different times. In the US bersions he wanted to eat them very often.
Nah, much older (at least 10 years old), less resemblance to AI text.
She is called smurfette in english o.o
Numerically speaking, the virus wants to keep smurfette alive as long as possible.
This comic still gives me some kinda ick.
TFW the antagonist in The Smurfs was right all along.
Didn’t he want to eat them or something? That sounds like a one-way ticket to a body horror ending…
He appeared in Robot Chicken and admitted that he was never all that clear on his motivations.
I think originally he wanted to use them to make gold
yep. that’s the biggest tell that the Smurfs is about communism. in any other kids story the antagonist would either want to get rid of them or eat them, which is why most people just assume that’s what he wants. but no, he wants gold. he’s a capitalist.
First book, he needs them to make gold.
Then it’s just revenge.
Or so I remember.
Gargamel is willing to bite the bullet for the greater good.
Gargamel would be patient zero of The Last of Us: Blue Edition.
I think you’re right… I was just imagining him coming in with a flamethrower in
onethe last episode
Thanks I hate it.
Parasites: Being Factories for more parasites, since 3.5 BYA or so (or when the first viruses emerged (viruses are parasites that kinda forgot how to do anything but parasitism))
